he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
