who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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