What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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