Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize