she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I need water and some morals
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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