So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Randomize
