my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
