you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
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