If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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