Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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