ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
