I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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