I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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