She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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