Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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