I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
I just gift wrapped bread.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize