Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize