it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
