oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
