You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
