So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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