guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
