Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
