susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
