my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
