Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
