I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
