I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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