I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
