im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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