i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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