In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
