should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Randomize
