what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
