i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
