didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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