I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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