she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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