R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Randomize
