ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
True strength comes from lack of pants
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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