shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize