used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
