Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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