Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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