She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
