Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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