U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
