Three words: puerto rican gang bang
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
What a dumb baby whore.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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