you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
