no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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