So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize