end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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